Broken

Broken
For the Psycho in Him & in You

Poetry Collection by Christina Leigh Pritchard

Cover Art: “shattered” by Jeannie Howlett

Selected Poems from Novel:

Pleasure

you claim I’ll never see pleasure
so this means in your heart I am not
how many times I measure
the things I feel
but deep inside I know,
I’ll never be able to deal
Without you
So please just go
So that I am not reminded
Everyday
That this is a lie

STOP

Stop messing with my emotions
You’re going to tear out my heart
And leave me screaming my confessions
Cause my motor you try to start
Then drift away
I get nervous and aroused
But you just continue to stay
Not ever knowing what it is you are doing
Stop messing with my head
Cause I can’t stop thinking about you
When I’m lying in bed
Thinking of all the things we could do
Stop messing with my mind
For if you do not
I will be left in an unfix-able bind.

Make Me

Make me follow your lead
Make my heart beat
Make my belly full of your seed
Make me yearn for your caress
Make my legs grow weak
Make my emotions one big mess
Make me depend upon you
Make my life revolve around yours
Make my decisions too
Make me love all there is about you
Make my desire lead me
Make my heart beat
Make my love known
Make me sweet
Make my soul no longer my own.

Funny

it’s funny how one day you care
but the next you don’t
it’s funny how yesterday all you did was stare
but now you won’t
it’s funny how you looked at me
but now will not
it’s funny how this relationship was meant to be
but emptiness is what we got
it’s funny how I am so scared to love someone
but you are not
it’s funny how much I want us to be one
but never hear you say I’m hot
it’s funny how much I love your smile
but how seldom you use it
it’s funny how I hate your style
but that makes you lit
it’s funny how much I need you in my life
but am petrified to ask if you’d like me as your wife.

The Question

Why do I always seem to let you hurt me?

Acceptance

maybe I’ll admit how I feel
before your gone
might even allow you to touch my heart
may even let you turn me on
Or should I go numb?
for my electricity I’d like you to start
only you can fulfill my desire
but I dread the thought we may part
leaving behind this fire
that burns through my flesh
melting the ice around my heart
leaving me heartless
like globs of paint disguised as art
is my emotions
phony
that’s what I’ve become
for hiding from pleasure is what I do
fearsome
of not being accepted by you

This is a Dream

Nights were restless
Days painful to the eyes
Felt as if life were just some big mess
Of hateful pranks and lies
Empty and rejected
Afraid that I did not deserve to be loved
When I met you this is also what I expected
But you came at me with open arms
And made me feel safe and wanted
Sometimes I get scared
That this is a dream
And I will awake to emptiness and scream
For you to come back
But find you gone
So I hold off from you just enough
To allow myself to move on
And it not be so tough.

[Pinwheel poem]

Never stopping is how this feels. I am nothing to you. Many hearts he steals. I wish I wasn’t his back up wheels. Nothing will make my pain unreal. This is what I must always remember, love is uncertain and never a solid deal. Don’t fall unless you can get up and crawl.

Do you want all of me?
or just the lower half?

Platonic

You’d think
I’d be happy to know
it’s just platonic
but I’m not
How screwy is that?
I complain and complain
then I want him
when he now doesn’t

Told Me

you sat down and told me you loved me then took out your leather cowboy belt-told me you loved me-my legs are bleeding-told me to sit down but it hurts too much-to lean-lean against this chair-told me to grow up so I covered the scars with my cloths-

And There You Were

And there you were, like a disease
Growing rapidly
In my heart
Choking and squeezing
Every beat
I loved you so much
You liked me
I know you did
But I guess like the moon
You changed
Again and again
Always a different shape
Your heart-is the moon
Mine the tide
Going along with what you decide

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