Split Personality

Porcelain

Look!
Look what I’ve become – just for you
Porcelain
Yup, perfect painted lips
beautiful eyes,
pretty pink fingertips
clothing
hair
all of it for you
Yea! You’ve put me on the mantle.
Look here come your friends and family
so proud of your little perfect doll.
What a good job you did!
I am so perfect
perfect just for you
oh how much praise you gain
Go ahead, tell them
your friends are leaving
you’re so wonderful
Now it’s time to start grieving
The door closes
Why do you have that bat?
I take one of my favorite poses
you smashed my leg!
I put on a longer dress to hide
what is not so perfect
cause I have to be
for you
always perfect
just for you
that’s my hair!
You’re locking me in that toy chest again?
Don’t you care?
I was so perfect today!
My lips
my eyes
even my hair that’s
that’s all-
pulled out.
Uh oh, a surprise visitor!
Take me out quick!
put me back.
I wear a gorgeous hat
with my perfect lips
and eyes
and h a i r
and um huh legs
No! Please don’t leave!
I’ll have to go back in that BOX again
I was so perfect today
don’t you care?
Hey, I-
wait, is that a permanent marker?
what are you doing?
You’re ruining my lips!
Stop! I can’t hide that!
A drill?
NOW what are you doing?
Do you love me still?
Not my eyes!
That’s my best part!
Stop stepping on my perfect fingers!
Just STOP IT!
I can’t take this
Ya know, I miss my toy chest
Put me back
tell your friends I wasn’t really the best
I don’t care
It was all for you anyway
I wanted to be perfect
so you’d love me
NOT my face!
Please, noo!
I don’t want
I don’t want to be your little dolly anymore

NOT ME

I point at you
everything is your fault
everything I do
you
not me
I don’t want to see
what a jerk
I am
I go to work
make money for Uncle Sam
smile
laugh
but after a while
my troubles creep back
and then attack
so I turn on you
cause I am perfect
the one and only
I force you to leave
I’ll not grieve
ok my own heart I deceive
I smile once more
laugh
I’m who all adore
I spot you in the store
the pain has ate through
to the core
of my heart
hi
I’m sorry
I wish I could die
I hate me
friends?
depends
we smile
we laugh
but after a while
trouble creeps back
my heart it does smack
I turn on you
your through
I cry
my whole existence
one big lie
I laugh
I smile
the wrath
in me boils
I miss you
I’ll never admit this
so go away
maybe someday
I’ll grow up
and not hurt you
cause I am a jerk
now I’m going to
smile
and laugh
till the troubles find me
again.

This Wall

I’ve got this wall
that people keep smashing
with sledge hammers
I can’t bare to watch it fall
come crashing
down
down
a pile of rubble
watch me frown
my heart full of trouble
I’ve never walked outside my protection
the real world
it’s scary
full of corruption
makes my fairy
tale life
childish
I never knew freedom
came with so much strife
if I had one wish
It would be that I wasn’t so dumb
that I knew how to be a friend
how to love
to understand
forgive
but in the end
on the ground is where I land
I just want to live
just want to live

 

WANT TO READ MORE?

e-book     *     Amazon

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: